A decadent orgy of materialistic delight in the pursuit of fashionable fuckery.
Akris Sheer Black Dress
This ridiculous piece of couture costs more than New York rent and probably only looks good on models in black and white, but damn, I wanna rock out those sheer side panels.
I could live in these billowy fuckers all summer long. They make me want to eat sorbet on the Amalfi coast and — unlike flights to Italy — are on sale.
Pink & Peplum
Goddammit, I want this dress. I loved everything in Jason Wu’s ridiculously gorgeous Spring collection, but I can’t stop drooling over this number.
(Asos has a knockoff, but it’s nothing compared to the real thing.)
The weather is shitty this weekend, and the most coveted clothing item at Coachella might end up being a parka. This neon colorblock pac-a-parka from Topshop folds into its own bag. (So yeah, you can keep your weed in it.)
Bold blazers are all the rage right now, and this bright yellow zinger from Zara has a zip feature that instantly takes it from a blazer to crop.
A Mondrian inspired wet suit? There aren’t many things hotter than that. Yves Saint Laurent would be proud.
The Lace Dress
Lover has nailed the art of flirty dresses, and this season’s collection is filled with lace deliciousness that I want to devour.
It’s time to start bikini shopping, and this fringy little coral number from Boys + Arrows is perfect for Coachella.
Helmut Lang Combo Blazer
If I was to get one statement jacket for this season, this clean slice of black and white hotness would be the one.
Vince Leather Tank Dress
Leather’s not just for winter anymore. This camel tone tank dress is a great investment piece that can be dressed up or down for day or night. Plus, it feels like butter.
The Cut Out Shirt
This top from Asos combines one of the hottest runway color trends (green as fuck) with an interesting crop front and dipped hemline silhouette plus badass cutouts in the back.
Black and White
I’ve seen so much neon the past few months that all I wanna wear going into Spring is black and white. I’m loving this look from Alexis. Bonus points for the lunatic fringe.
Ksubi Spray On Skinny Jeans
My ass looks fucking fabulous in these.
Faux Fox Fur Coat
If you’re looking for a cool winter coat, check out the ones at ASOS. They’re all 20% off at the moment. Stay warm, bitches.
How many goats do I have to sacrifice to satan to find out where you got the shirt that appears to be Lassie with “bitches and hoes” written on top?
The designer’s name is Gordon Holden. You can pick one up along with a bunch more cool shit at his online shop.